The 15th anniversary of Srebrenica is today; these strong women buried 775 Muslim men and boys this year. See "Boxing a Youtube Genocide" for my post from the anniversary last year.
The following is a piece I wrote for Jottings, the literary publication of the Mere Christianity Forum. I reflect on my experiences in the wake of war. Where others seem to lose God, I found Him/Her in the Valley of the Shadow of Death.
- Though I walk through the valley
- of the shadow of death,
- I will fear no evil
- Psalm 23:4
My Jottings submission:
I was ready. I had no choice. I had to go in prepared, rehearsed and researched. Three visits to massacre sites in less than two years. Yet, this time I was alone to visit and conduct research in Srebrenica, the site of the worst European massacre since World War II.
The wake of war became shockingly casual - burned houses with naked skeletons of three story houses were familiar. I continued with my daily routine, trying to forget that the house in front of mine suffered the loss of three boys. I continued shopping for groceries even after realizing the man in the juice aisle has no left arm; then rationalizing that it was more important that was a man still alive.
I joined the 30, 000 people at the Memorial Ceremony of July 11, 2009. Fourteen years after the war ended, Srebrenica had only to bury 534 men and boys that year. They laid to rest 534 more from the over 8, 000 Muslims killed while seeking sanctuary in a UN Safe Zone. As I witnessed the line of coffins filing by me, I paid my respect with such meager offerings - my camera, my witness, this voice. I didn't break, didn't cry. I had no right to cry, I have lost nothing.
The funeral and memorial ceremony were an act of solidarity. This gave me hope because I was part of thousands who continue to remind the world that we pledged “never again” after the Holocaust. I felt the raw edges between the “Kingdom Come” and a world trying to bring the Kingdom now as we echo the mantra “never again” through Cambodia, Bosnia, Rwanda and now Darfur.
Consequently, what scared me and moved me to tears was a video I saw on Youtube. It was recorded by a Serb soldier during the massacre; a father was yelling for his son to come down from hiding in the mountains while surrounded by soldiers that would eventually add him to a mass grave. Genocide had found Youtube, and I couldn't take it. If we can now watch people literally being marched to their grave and not react, what kind of sick game is this? When taught about the Holocaust, why are we not also taught about the concentration camps in Argentina or the 677 camps that filled Bosnia? I used to imagine my “Valley of the Shadow of Death" as natural worse case scenarios - cancer, death of a family member, or a serious accident. My Valley was quite small because I was raised in a world that gave me a perfect childhood sanitized of extreme pain. Yet, I had found a manufactured Valley of the Shadow of Death – one filled with structural violence – such war, poverty and inequality.
As a result, I almost drowned in the face of “daily crucifixions.” For a while, I merely treaded water among questions of solidarity, suffering and my personal anger. By day I would meet concentration camp survivors and by night I would read their stories. In Sarajevo I waited in the same line to buy lunch where 16 people died in during the war*. Walking home, I knew what areas to avoid because they had yet to be de-mined. As my Valley encountered and absorbed more violence, I became polarized. How could I not only remain neutral, but also forgive people for crimes I never witnessed?
The day after the Srebrenica funeral, I heard young Serb Nationalists came into Srebrenica and yell “we will rid the Balkans of all Muslims.” How could I love these kids, younger than me, who screamed death threats the day after the community buried 534 beloved ones? All I wanted to do was vomit; I needed a concrete physical release from the disgust I felt from inside a preventable Valley of Death.
I was no longer in the shadows, I was meeting people who had survived war and lost others from preventable murder. One of the people I would encounter was Miroslav Volf, torture survivor and theologian; his work offers a transparent theology that reminds us we are called to a relationship of love, reconciliation and forgiveness. I was shown a Valley so deep and wide that it both brings me to my knees and revives me. Where others seem to lose God, I found Him/Her. It was on the edge, that I could hear God whispering the same words an Iraqi father spoke to his child: “Come back my son, come to my lap. I am your father.” Both fathers have known intimate violence and the pain of losing their children to war.
I came to realize that the “Valley of the Shadow of Death” is supposed to be a magnificent Valley that testifies of the Kingdom. I used to consider the natural splendor a cruel exaggeration of the suffering, but now I know it is God challenging affliction. Killing fields such as Srebrenica and El Mozote are truly sacred because they are Holy Ground. It is here we feel the edges of the Kingdom; for it is in profound beauty and profound oppression that concrete theology manifests; it is an opportunity to bring the kingdom now, not just to come.
We must stop saying "Never Again” if we make this promise and then remain neutral. "Until Next Time" is more appropriate until justice has been served and violence prevented. If I wanted to consume information and remain neutral, I would have stayed home and googled Srebrenica. As the July 11 anniversary of Srebrenica approaches each year, I fight for “they kingdom come:” I educate myself on the current wars by complimenting mainstream media with independent sources such as Democracy Now! or Al Jazeera English (they are not embedded with American troops). I “speak truth to power” by signing petitions and notifying my representatives that there is accountability. I also offer my support to organizations such as Witness for Peace who refuse to leave the conflict zones the world seems to have abandoned.
Please start to bring the Kingdom now by signing the petition to say “Never Again” in the face of the current genocide in Darfur, Sudan.
May those who never forget remind us who try!
Resources
The Srebrenica Genocide Blog is constantly updating with new information.
General background information on the worst European massacre (in a UN Safe Zone) since WWII can be found here.
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