8 a.m. War Call

As part of the Vista House community, we all share our narratives during the year. In the process of attempting to articulate my story & theology, I wrote the following prayer:

I am deliberately writing this out - pen to paper, heart to soul. As a daughter of privilege, seeking to follow my Father to His crucified people - this is my only connection - the contact point inside my head. My people, my fragile and beautiful friend group - my tribe cannot handle this. I can barely handle this.

God, give me peace of mind. Peace of Spirit. Trust.
Let me trust my community.
Let me be confidant in my story of faith, in my testimony. - that I have found You in the Valley of the Shadow of Death. that you did not find me in Bible studies and white suburban churches. I don't want to look for you there, because if there - you would be the predictability I was resisting. You did not fit nicely in between the American dream of 3 kids, a Volvo and a gated community.

Lord, give me peace. Give me righteous anger, but take away this rage.

I have more peace of mind abroad, in the face of extremes, than here. There, I can exhale and trust you. I know I am in the Kingdom of God. But, here - am I strong enough to fight my own head? Take this morning- I woke alone a little before 7 to shower and prepare to lead Morning Prayer. I turned on Al Jazeera for the morning news. Listening from afar, I heard news of a sniper and immediately thought Sarajevo. I looked to see if I recognized the buildings, the neighborhood - kinda. Sure enough, and to my dismay, it was BiH. At least abroad, I am braced, ready for the 2 extreme worlds. But, here, it is the subtlety that is alarming - I am not just a 22-year-old getting ready one Tuesday morning. I am shocked when I complete my outfit with a scarf, and realize, I have put on Sarajevo. I am wearing her. This is intimate. This is a lifestyle.

I am trying to process the thoughts and feelings of seeing Sniper Alley, people running for water - for their life. Srebrenica. These violent thoughts follow me down the stairs and into the kitchen. As I make coffee, I think - you don't know me. You cannot possibly want in my head. It's barely 8 am, and I've already been to war.

Tomfoolery at the Vista House

Traveler's Rest

I flirted with a gap-year before college, but ultimately never took one. I knew I would not come back. Instead, I promised myself that I would be a commuter - traveling between the Global South and Global North whenever possible. Ultimately, Furman allowed me to visit more countries as a full-time student than I could have ever imagined. I was not only politicized around issues of social justice, politics, and the Global South, but became addicted and consequently chased what has been named the "third world glow."

This blog was never supposed to mature into just that, a full-functioning/developed blog. What started as the now standard college blog to largely communicate with parents and friends, was quickly catalyzed into something entirely different with my introduction to Latin American politics. I became fascinated with narrating what I was witnessing, not what landmarks I had hit in country X. Yet, in an attempt not to regurgitate my daily travel schedule via posts chronicling my every move, I have failed to fill in some gaps - mainly in communicating when I returned Stateside.


I was so eager to disassociate myself with the formulaic suburban lifestyle, I was convinced the urgency and intensity found abroad simply could not exist in the United States. In reality, this blog title applies more to my time spent Stateside. The culture shock hits here, where the beautiful Latin American people who have so generously invited me into their struggle are now the faces I see as landscaping crews or janitorial staff. I literally went from one extreme to another - leaving the Americas Social Forum in Paraguay for a home state now threatening a version of Arizona's SB 1070. It is nothing less than shocking to leave a culture saturated with discussions of human rights, social movements, and progressive government policies to enter into a sanitized political environment devoid of Latino support networks.

Now back in the Unites States for an entire academic year, finishing up the credits needed to graduate, I am slowly learning to negotiate the tension of life in South Carolina, and effectively advocate here. It is a constant battle to convince myself to stay. At the time of the attempted coup in Ecuador, I was stunned to realize I had to bring up the breaking news if the class was to discuss it. I have no interest in playing with ideas, parading around a manicured campus in the shadow of the ivory tower, while Latin America was on on fire - escalating threats against human rights activists in Guatemala, massive mining protests in Bolivia, and the election in Brazil expected to replace the popular Lula with female presidential candidate Dilma Rousseff.



So, where do I call home? A tiny town outside of Furman named .... Traveler's Rest. I am hoping that my mother can now take a break from sending me polite emails reminding me to come home.

After previewing life abroad, I could not live on campus where my entire world would be behind the university gates. Furman is fortunate enough to have a progressive campus ministry known as the Mere Christianity Forum. All my experience and travel can now be expressed as a lifestyle I believe in - living as part of a community offering a different version of faith. I live at the Vista House, an intentional Christian community dedicated to hospitality, community and the arts. Six residents live at the house with the hope that our home can be a sanctuary for students. The bottom floor of our home is always open to the Furman community as provide meals twice a week. Each Sunday we gear up for $4 dinners, where we serve between 20-50 students vegetarian meals. Wednesday nights are reserved for our ongoing dinner serious known as "Evening With...". The Vista House invites Furman faculty or community members to our dinner table to engage in "sharp dialogue and intentional conversation". Our presence on campus is expressed through the Mere Christianity Forum - a Christian ministry that compliments others at Furman by creating a space for dialogue. Taking the lead of our namesake, CS Lewis, we try to advance a framework of faith, reason and tomfoolery by hosting weekly theological forums.


So, if you are ever in the neighborhood, I finally have a guest room to offer!